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To people who haven’t experienced true Tantra, their thoughts on the topic are generally related to wild, long-lasting amazing sexual experiences. To people who have experienced it, Tantra is usually related to great sex, power, freedom and blissful states. Sure, those are parts of Tantra, but Living Tantra is actually a PRACTICE.
Tantra asks us to remember the love that we are and be that love when we relate to people even if we want to run and hide. Even if we want to scream and shout. Tantra asks us, can we love what’s in front of us right here, right now? Can we love our partner how they are right now and not for their potential? If I didn’t change for the rest of my life, do I love who I am right now?
Cultivating the capacity to be love means loving ourselves and other unconditionally. Of course, we are going to stuff this up at times. Even the most enlightened beings I’ve met cannot love unconditionally 24/7. But we can make it a practice. Much like we would approach meditating, exercise, healthy eating and the like as something we are learning, cultivating and bringing into our daily existence as a conscious choice.
It is very easy to be attached to pleasure and bliss. Of course we can maintain levels of extreme bliss and oneness states when we are alone. But how are we in relationships? This is where most people struggle because when love is present, anything that isn’t love arises. Meaning, when we are in a relationship all of our shit comes up. It actually comes up to be touched and healed, but we have to be willing to look at our shit for this to happen.
“Often when we are fighting with our partner, unconsciously we are testing whether they can love all of us, not just our light. But a more important question is, can you love all of you, not just your light?”
Living Tantra means asking ourselves, humbly, how are my relationships? Our relationship with not just the beloved, but our relationship with ourselves, our friends, family, work, community, God/Spirit, our passions and hobbies. Then using the answer as a barometer for how deeply we are practicing Tantra. The depth to what arises is dependent on your level of self enquiry. What arises may be to express our needs, be vulnerable, assert boundaries, prioritise ourselves, meditate, listen, feel, shake, chant, forgive, be compassionate.
When we resist the Chrysalis that allows us to Metamorphose, we are resisting change. We live in a spoilt culture that wants everything to be easy. But the real practice is in Tantra beyond the bedroom. It is looking at our shit and feeling our pain as well as our pleasure. It is a practice of coming back to our centre, coming back to unconditional love.
When you are no longer attached to pleasure and resistant to pain, you are Living Tantra. When you are rising in love and allowing your relationships to help you heal and grow, you are Living Tantra. When you a part of a community of brothers and sisters who support each other, sing and laugh together, who reflect, share and connect, you are Living Tantra.
To the women of Perth who want to practice Tantra as a way of life, join us on the incredible 8 Week Womens Embodiment Journey this Feb and March known as LIFE TANTRA. By the end of it, you will have looked at and overcome your blockages (your shit) so you can live a more empowered, authentic life. What this means is that you will be able to put your time and energy into what matters to you and Live Tantra; Live Love and Live Freedom. The immense power that exists within the sisterhood for women will unfold a magical and powerful journey for all.
Dakini Chantelle
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