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“Everything in moderation, including moderation” — I Know Oscar Wilde Was Tantric


In an earlier post, I shared about one of my clients and friends, Caitlyn Cook, who’s had a really tough year. She’s encountered stuff that has really knocked her sense of self, dignity and aliveness.

Here’s her profound and tender insights from a week intensive we did together with Tara at Margaret River (part three).

One of the things I love about Tantra is how it includes the full spectrum of life. It’s not just interested in pureness, it loves dirt. It doesn’t just want stillness meditation, it wants wild dance. It’s not about being a perfect angel, it’s about being a wild animal too.

Tantric spirituality is not boring and dull. It’s mixed with fun, silliness, earnestness, working through pains, diving into pleasure, health, letting go. It’s discerning, but unlike many spiritual practices, it’s not judgmental.

Tantra loves accepting all of life and seeing the Divine in all of it.

I really felt this over my Tantric spiritual week away with my mentor. From the greasy gassy to the profound meditations, my transformation and aliveness came through experiencing the full spectrum of life together. Nothing was ‘profane’ or ‘unspiritual’; everything was welcome.

Picture this: in the car with my spiritual leader mentor and her bestie, we drove down to Margaret River listening to sexy Rhye, boppy Beiber and vibrant, hip-jiving African music.

In the car, we talked about all manner of things sacred, cheeky, sexy, loving, sad, real, dirty, vulnerable.

We stopped at the gassy and the three of us played with a bouncy ball as we waited for our fish and chips. I drank a coke too. And smoked a ciggie.

The rest of the weekend swung between tears, profound processing and release, laughter, lounge-room dancing, nature walks, wine, bajhans, shopping, dirty talk and dirty dancing, meditation, goddesses, incredible meals, massages and Tarot readings.

In the words of Oscar Wilde, Tantra feels like “Everything in moderation, including moderation.”

That’s my kinda spirituality.

Less judgment, more curiosity. Less rules, more inner guidance. Full earnestness, full playfulness. Be the saint, be the devil. Be the mother, be the whore. Be the angel, be the animal. Be in pain, be in pleasure. Be YOU. In all the colours.

Picture of Caitlyn Cook

Caitlyn Cook

Caitlyn Cook is a Tantra-inspired facilitator, writer, and coach. Her mission is to help bring mindfulness to sexuality. Caitlyn offers workshops, private sessions, and resources to bring ease, confidence and spice into your connections with yourself and others.