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Turning the Pain of Change to a Plan of Action!


When things change for the worse, the ego resists, causing stress, dis-ease and resistance!  Remember a situation when you weren’t expecting a big change such as being fired from your job or unexpectedly breaking up with your partner? Yes, this shift can be painful, however, this pain doesn’t have to continue with further resistance to the situation.  It’s fair enough for you to feel the emotion running through your body, however, once you attach story to the emotion, you are expending vital lifeforce energy through resistance that DOES NOT SERVE YOU!

So when the emotion comes up, drop the mental story and use your body to feel the pain, the anger, frustration, grief of the end of the relationship, fear of losing the financial security through your job etc.  Eventually, the energy dissipates, and you reach a state of calmness.  You’ve experienced this before, when you’ve experienced a sad moment in your life and cried until the tears ran dry and there’s just… peace. The emotional body has expressed without story.

For all but the most enlightened being the ego will create a story to explain the pain: “Why me? What did I do to deserve this? Why can’t things go right for me?”. From this point, you are expending useless energy in a victim (e.g. resentment, grief) or perpetrator state (e.g. projecting, anger).  Catch this moment!  In this society, we have such avoidance of pain that when we experience it, we look for the perpetrator – the external force that caused this pain so we can avoid it in the future.   However, change happens through the body, not the mind.  So the challenge is to see the story for what it is – a story to explain the situation, like watching a movie.


There’s no need for this story to attach to the emotion as that is when RESISTANCE arises, and from resistance, INACTION is born. Imagine you’re a Captain of a ship sailing along in a constant breeze.  Suddenly, the wind dies and now your ship’s now dead in the water. Instead of preparing the sails, regrouping and taking stock to prepare for the next breeze to come along, you spend your time grumbling, swearing and cursing the wind for abandoning your sails! When the wind comes back, you’re unprepared and you’ve lost your chance to take full advantage of the opportunity.

Or perhaps while you’re assessing your new situation, you notice an island that you would have otherwise sailed right by.  By taking action, you’re not paralysed by resistance, and when the wind comes back, you can sail to the island to claim its treasures of opportunity or you sail on with the newfound experience the change has presented you with. So instead of having the new winds buffet your ship, throwing your boat into chaos, you feel the force of the wind on your back as you look forward for the next opportunity in life!

The next time a story from the ego arises to “justify” the painful change in your life, take action! Take stock and see the situation from the Eagle awareness – where you expand your awareness to take in the heavens and the earth and are ready to focus on new opportunities with keen vision.  Be the courageous Captain of your ship, ready to take advantage of the next opportunity that arises instead of being paralysed by the resistance to change!    From this higher awareness and the soulful courage of the heart, change is only another pathway to SUCCESS!

Picture of Antosh Sokol

Antosh Sokol

Co-Manager and Practitioner, Eliyah Tantra School